Kissing Jessica Stein

Upon greeting someone in America, you are either a hugger or a cheek kisser (unless you really know them). Possibly, at times, a simple hello will do. However, when you first meet someone, a hand shake is appropriate. Many times, it depends on the background of who you are greeting. On my dad's side of the family we are all cheek kissers, my friends from high school are huggers, and many of my friends from Northern Virginia are more comfortable with the simple hello--no contact needed.

I have learned the rules. I know who to kiss, when to hug, and when to keep my distance. Well, as with most things that were turned upside by moving to Georgia, all of these rules were thrown out the window. 

Put on your ChapStick ladies and gentlemen for the rules of greeting people in Georgia are different.

 1.  In social settings, you kiss everyone hello and goodbye--even if you are meeting them for the first time.

2.  Women kiss both women and men.

3.  Men also kiss both women and men.

The tricky part for me wasn't the kissing because I am all about kissing. Instead, it was the technique that messed me up. Really, it boiled down to knowing which cheek to aim for. In America, I always go left. My goal is to brush the right cheek of my target. That is what I have always done and what I think others do too. It is a general understanding that is followed by all so as not to cause any broken noses or face dancing while trying to say hello. But in Georgia, everyone goes to the right. The person's left cheek is what you are aiming for.

When I first moved here, I could not remember to go right. I created many awkward moments with virtual strangers as they tried to understand why we were awkwardly moving our heads back and forth like two people meeting in a narrow hallway trying to get around each other.

My all time low was in a bar, meeting a colleague of Emet's for the first time. As our faces approached each other, I once again forgot to go right while she confidently did the Georgian-appropriate move and aimed for my left cheek. Instead of engaging in my familiar face dancing routines of the past, I panicked and we ended up locking lips.  

Yup, that's right. I kissed Emet's colleague, directly on the mouth while in a bar.

As an educator, I know everyone learns better by doing and sometimes complete and utter failure can help raise one’s skill level. You can believe that since that night I always go right. I don't need a repeat of that incident and all the embarrassing hoopla to remind me which cheek to aim for. I always go right.

Now, when I return to America, let's hope I can return to my left going ways. Otherwise, I am bound to end up kissing another person on the lips. This time they might not be as understanding as Emet’s colleague was of a culturally unadjusted American… especially in my own country.